Want Him or Be Him? The G+Q Map (Free PDF)

You see him in the mirror before you see him in the room. Two benches down. And then the question so many of you have written to me about: Do I want him, or do I wanna be him?

Heterosexuals have maps to make sense of their desire. Where are ours?

This free companion guide to the video gives you the first pieces of one: the G+Q Map. It moves through three regions, Meaning, Assessment and Purpose. It draws on Freud, Gilgamesh and Enkidu, Bernard Brandchaft’s pathological accommodation, and Ignacio Martín-Baró’s liberation psychology. It ends with a depth practice: C. G. Jung’s active imagination, from a gay perspective.

Inside:

• The full talk, cleaned up and easy to read

• All the cue cards from the video, in full color

• The four steps of active imagination, applied to “the man on the bench,” with two guardrails

• 12 journal prompts, organized by the map, with space to write

• The stories of Andy, Harry and John from my novel Healing Gay Sex and Love

It’s free. Take it at your own pace, try the practice, and tell me in the comments how it went. What did he say?

Dr. Douglas Sadownick, Ph.D., LMFT
Depth psychologist · 30 years in practice · Founder of the nation’s first LGBT specialization in clinical psychology

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Do I want him, or do I wanna be him? This free guide gives you the first pieces of a gay map for desire: the full talk, the cue cards, Jung’s active imagination in four steps, and 12 journal prompts.

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Start with the four steps of active imagination when you have twenty quiet minutes and a journal. Don’t force the figure; receive him. And remember the guardrails: you’re talking to the figure inside you, not the man at the gym, and if a child memory floods, bring it to a therapist.

Next time: David and Jonathan. Subscribe so you don’t miss it.

Want to go deeper? My books are at douglassadownick.com/books, and you can pre-order The Gay Hero’s Journey by writing me at askdrdougphd@gmail.com.

Dr. Doug
Psychology for the People